SAT Writing : Improving Paragraphs

Study concepts, example questions & explanations for SAT Writing

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Example Questions

Example Question #421 : Improving Paragraphs

1 Lemon juice with cayenne pepper, cabbage soup, cookies, grapefruit. 2 What do these have in common?3 They are all key ingredients in recent fad diets; since these diets sound promising, few lead to any permanent weight loss.4 Some of the worst can even lead to health problems, such as, vitamin deficiencies or anemia. 5 Instead of being concerned with lasting weight loss, they are promoting radical changes that only last a short time. 6 Cutting out too many calories at once from your diet can lead to dizziness, heart palpitations, and even a slower metabolism.

7 Some thinkers suggest that fad diets are really a way for us to impose order on our chaotic world, hundreds of food choices, conflicting advice from various health experts. 8 So why diet at all?

What word or phrase should be deleted from Sentence 6?

Possible Answers:

“and even”

“too many”

“can”

“Cutting out”

“from your diet”

Correct answer:

“from your diet”

Explanation:

What else can a person cut calories from other than a diet? Cut the unessential and redundant words here. Also, none of the other words can be cut without altering the meaning or grammatical structure of the sentence.

Example Question #2641 : Sat Writing

1 Thoreau went to them when he wished to live deliberately, Whitman wrote about them in his book Leaves of Grass. 2 They clean the air, and harbor wildlife. 3 There are nearly 200 million, protected acres of them in the United States. 4 Forests are a national treasure.

5 Since the late 1800s, Congress and Presidents have decorated various areas of the country as national forests, grasslands, and preserves. 6 Some well known National Parks include the Grand Canyon, Yosemite, Yellowstone, and the Great Smoky Mountains. 7 Protecting forests helps safeguard native plant and animal species, it honors landscapes complex histories, and preserving the natural beauty for future generations.

Which sentence should be deleted from the passage?

Possible Answers:

Sentence 5

Sentence 3

Sentence 4

Sentence 6

Sentence 2

Correct answer:

Sentence 6

Explanation:

Sentence 6 randomly lists some national parks and in no way contributes to the fundamental discussion the history, principles, and basis for preserving, specifically, forests and grasslands.

Example Question #187 : Inserting Or Deleting Content

1 Since its inception in the 19th century, photography has played various and complex roles. 2 Crude pinhole cameras first appeared in antiquity. 3 Silver salts, the colloidon process, and daguerreotypes were all developed during the 1800s as photography took form and it’s technology evolved.

4 By the 1900s, photography was often considered an equal of, or at least analgesic to, painting and other visual art forms. 5 In much the same way that portrait painters used to memorialize their subjects in gilded frames and oil paints, photography now serves to document people’s daily lives, experiences, and possessions, such as what someone has eaten for dinner or seen on a road trip. 6 For example, on social media sites.

7 Photography can capture such minuet, intimate details that some aboriginal peoples famously believed cameras could steal the subject’s soul. 8 Perhaps this is why paparazzi are so victimized by others in their profession: Their intrusiveness may reveal more about the subject than he or she would like. 9 Celebrity photographers including Annie Liebovitz, who often favors a black and white composition, who also works for a famous magazine, attempt to portray the essence of famous people through a single photographic portrait. 10 Photography serves to document war atrocities, famine, or other human rights issues. 11 For example, Nick Ut’s famous picture of Vietnamese children being burned by napalm helped turn American public opinion against the Vietnam War, while Dorothea Lange’s photographs of migrant workers during the Great Depression influenced public policy regarding the treatment of these workers. 12 In the end, photography can be journalistic or artistic, significant or intrusive or ephemeral.

Which sentence is least relevant to the passage and should be deleted from the text?

Possible Answers:

Sentence 9

Sentence 8

Sentence 7

Sentence 11

Sentence 10

Correct answer:

Sentence 9

Explanation:

Sentence 9 is too specific for the rest of the passage and should be cut. As a whole, the passage gives an overview of the evolution of photography and the various roles photography has played in society, and Sentence 9 becomes sidetracked by details about a specific photographer that have no relevance to the overall aim of the passage.

Example Question #52 : Deleting Content

Are you trying to stick to a budget? Using coupons for purchases, also known as “couponing” is a great way to save money on groceries. Coupons are a little piece of paper that can give you a discount on what you buy. You will be amazed at the great bargains and amazing savings you can get!

It’s easy to get started. When you open up your daily newspaper, one might find a glossy insert full of coupons. Some of the coupons will be for things you don’t buy, some will be for things you buy all the time. Go through the coupons and chop out the ones you can use.

The key to successful couponing is getting multiple copies of coupon circulars. Ask your friends, your neighbors, and family if they have any extras. Some coupon users even go through the recycling at their office to find more coupons! Have you ever heard of such a thing in your life! Completely devoted, these circulars help coupon users to get even more savings.

Couponing might sound like hard work, but for many people, it’s also a hobby. Not only does it help them save hundreds of dollars per year, but also it gives them a fun challenge every time they do their shopping.

The writer is considering deleting the underlined sentence. Should he or she do so, and why or why not? 

Possible Answers:

Yes, this sentence is too basic in nature, and below the high scholarly tone of the rest of the passage

No, this sentence includes a comma splice

Yes, this sentence gives information that is contradicted later in the passage

None of these answers is accurate.

No, this sentence gives a key definition that is directly relevant to the main point of the passage

Correct answer:

No, this sentence gives a key definition that is directly relevant to the main point of the passage

Explanation:

This question is asking you to assess the contextual relevance of a section of the passage. The underlined portion gives key, basic definitional information, relating directly to the main focus of the passage. The practice of "couponing" which is the focus of the passage is fundamentally based on the more basic knowledge of a what coupon even is, which is provided in this sentence.

Example Question #53 : Deleting Content

The Moluccas is a chain, or archetype, of islands belonging to Indonesia. Historically, these islands were known as the Spice Islands for their abundance of nutmeg, cloves, mace, and pepper, this profundity of spices eventually drew colonial attention. Spices such as cloves, cinnamon, cardamom, anise, and pepper were particularly popular during the medieval times. In the 1600s, the Spice Wars arose as a result of competing Portuguese and Dutch interest’s in the Spice Islands. The bloody conflict ended in the deaths of many native Moluccans as well as European traders, wherefore both Portugal and the Netherlands gained and lost territories ranging from Africa and South America. For this day, strife occasionally breaks out on the islands although it is now motivated by religious and not colonial disagreements. It is located just west of New Guinea in the Pacific Ocean, and its more than 1,000 islands are home to more than 2 million people today.

Which sentence should be deleted from the passage?

Possible Answers:

Historically, these islands were known as the Spice Islands for their abundance of nutmeg, cloves, mace, and pepper, this profundity of spices eventually drew colonial attention.

The Moluccas is a chain, or archetype, of islands belonging to Indonesia.

In the 1600s, the Spice Wars arose as a result of competing Portuguese and Dutch interest’s in the Spice Islands.

Spices such as cloves, cinnamon, cardamom, anise, and pepper were particularly popular during the medieval times.

The bloody conflict ended in the deaths of many native Moluccans as well as European traders, wherefore both Portugal and the Netherlands gained and lost territories ranging from Africa and South America.

Correct answer:

Spices such as cloves, cinnamon, cardamom, anise, and pepper were particularly popular during the medieval times.

Explanation:

While it does discuss spices, the third sentence, "Spices such as cloves, cinnamon, cardamom, anise, and pepper were particularly popular during the medieval times," is the only sentence that does not discuss the Moluccas, the central topic of this passage. This question was asking you to assess the contextual relevance of a sentence providing detail. While passages like this one require specific details in order to justify their larger claims, not every detail is valuable. Random selections of trivia, even if tangentially related to the topic, should be deleted so as to preserve the passage's central focus. All of the other sentences provided related back to the central thesis and focus of the passage to a greater degree than is the third sentence.

Example Question #61 : Deleting Content

There are two different ways to consider the so-called “Dark Ages.” On the one hand, you can think of the period directly after the fall of the Roman Empire, when civilization began to collapse throughout the Western Empire. On the other hand, you can consider the period that followed this initial collapse of society. It is a gross simplification too use the adjective dark to describe the civilization of either of these periods.

As regards the first period, it is quite a simplification to consider this period to be a single historical moment. It is not as though the civilization switched off like a lightbulb. At one moment light and then, at the next, dark. Instead, the decline of civilization occurred over a period of numerous decades and was, in fact, already occurring for many years before the so-called period of darkness. Thus, the decline of civilization was not a rapid collapse into barbarism, but instead, was a slow alteration of the cultural milieu of a partition of Europe. Indeed, the Eastern Roman Empire retained much of it’s cultural status during these years of decline!

More importantly, the period following the slow collapse of the Western Empire was much less “dark” than almost every popular telling states. Indeed, even during the period of decline, the seeds for cultural restoration was being sown. A key element of this cultural revival were the formation of monastic communities throughout the countryside of what we now know as Europe. Although these were not the only positive force during these centuries, the monasteries had played an important role in preserving and advancing the cause of culture through at least the thirteenth century and arguably until the Renaissance.

The writer is considering deleting the underlined sentence. Should he or she do so, and why or why not? 

Possible Answers:

No, this sentence provides necessary supporting evidence for the claims made in the first paragraph

No, this sentence introduces the topic of the second paragraph; it is relevant, effective, and necessary

Yes, this sentence is grammatically incorrect and not sufficiently relevant to the content; it should be deleted

Yes, this sentence is simply too wordy, and it should be deleted

Yes, this sentence is not sufficiently related to the content that comes after it, and it should be deleted.

Correct answer:

No, this sentence introduces the topic of the second paragraph; it is relevant, effective, and necessary

Explanation:

Firstly, we need to evaluate the underlined sentence grammatically, and determine if it is correctly written. We can see that the opening dependent clause is correctly punctuated, and there are no usage errors in the sentence. So, now we need to evaluate its exact contextual relevance, which in this case is to set up the claims of the second paragraph.

Example Question #91 : Separating, Combining, Or Moving Sentences

(1) During the 1960s, many directors from Czechoslovakia contributed to a film movement called "Czechoslovak New Wave." (2) This period is often considered to be the golden age of Czechoslovak cinema. (3) These films often used improvised dialogue rather than a script and featured many non-professional actors. (4) The directors from this period wished to capture the authentic experience of living in Czechoslovakia at the time. (5) However, a series of new censorship laws introduced by the Communist Party in 1968 halted the movement and motivated several of the key directors to flee to America.

Which of the following is the best option for separating Sentence 5 into two sentences?

Possible Answers:

However, this halted the movement and motivated several of the key directors to flee to America. A series of new censorship laws were introduced by the Communist Party in 1968.

However, the Communist Party introduced a series of new censorship laws in 1968. This halted the movement and motivated several of the key directors to flee to America.

However, a series of new censorship laws introduced by the Communist Party in 1968 halted the movement and motivated several of the key directors. To flee to America.

However, a series of new censorship laws introduced by the Communist Party in 1968. Halted the movement and motivated several of the key directors to flee to America.

However, a series of new censorship laws. Introduced by the Communist Party in 1968, this halted the movement and motivated several of the key directors to flee to America.

Correct answer:

However, the Communist Party introduced a series of new censorship laws in 1968. This halted the movement and motivated several of the key directors to flee to America.

Explanation:

This answer is the only one with two complete sentences that logically follow one another.

Example Question #112 : Analyzing, Combining, And Moving Content

1 Seaweed; a type of algae that’s a promising resource for the future. 2 It can be used with a fuel, medicine, fuel source, and even fertilizer. 3 Often being both farmed or foraged. 4 In Indonesia, China, Korea, and the Philippines are among the world’s largest producers of seaweed, it is used for everything from sushi and bread to dessert. 5 Medically, speaking derivatives of seaweed can be optimized in bandages, dental molds, and microbiology cultures. 6 Girls especially will squeal when they hear that seaweed’s components are used to make many pretty makeup products. 7 It should come as no surprise, then, that countries around the world are investing significant capital in seaweed research.

How should Sentence 4 be separated?

Possible Answers:

This sentence should not be separated.

In Indonesia, China, Korea, and the Philippines. Are among the world’s largest producers of seaweed. It is used for everything from sushi and bread to dessert.

In Indonesia, China, Korea, and the Philippines – among the world’s largest producers of seaweed – from sushi and bread to dessert.

In Indonesia, China, Korea, and the Philippines are among the world’s largest producers of seaweed. It is used for everything from sushi and bread to dessert.

In Indonesia, China, Korea, and the Philippines. Are among the world’s largest producers of seaweed, it is used for everything from sushi and bread to dessert.

Correct answer:

In Indonesia, China, Korea, and the Philippines are among the world’s largest producers of seaweed. It is used for everything from sushi and bread to dessert.

Explanation:

Sentence 4 contains two independent clauses incorrectly separated with a comma, so the two clauses must be broken apart.

Example Question #1 : Separating Sentences

1 Acoustics is a field of science that refers to the study of mechanical waves but it is best known for its relation to audible sound. 2 Acoustics has been a branch of human impunity since ancient Greece, Pythagoras investigated musical harmonies.3 Concert halls, headphones, car speakers: all are things that employ acoustical studies to electrocute listeners’ experiences. 4 Sound is not important to just humans; it allows birds, elephants, elk, and other animals to attract mates and defend their territories.

5 It benefits to understand sound waves and their behaviors, when engineers have this knowledge everyone from Roman amphitheaters to modern day punk rockers can enjoy a better listening experience.

How should Sentence 1 be separated?

Possible Answers:

Acoustics is a field of science that refers to the study of mechanical waves but it is best known for its relation to audible sound. (no change)

Acoustics is a field of science that refers to the study of mechanical waves. But it has always best been known for its relation to audible sound.

Acoustics is a field of science that refers to the study of mechanical waves but it is best known for something else. That is to say, its relation to audible sound.

Acoustics is a field of science that refers to the study of mechanical waves. However, it is best known for its relation to audible sound.

Acoustics is a field of science. It refers to the study of mechanical waves but it is best known for its relation to audible sound.

Correct answer:

Acoustics is a field of science that refers to the study of mechanical waves. However, it is best known for its relation to audible sound.

Explanation:

Because Sentence 1 is both long and an introductory sentence, the best choice is to break it up into two shorter, easier to grasp sentences. All of the other options either create sentence fragments or awkward sentences that do not transition smoothly from one to the next.

Example Question #2 : Separating Sentences

1 Lemon juice with cayenne pepper, cabbage soup, cookies, grapefruit. 2 What do these have in common?3 They are all key ingredients in recent fad diets; since these diets sound promising, few lead to any permanent weight loss.4 Some of the worst can even lead to health problems, such as, vitamin deficiencies or anemia. 5 Instead of being concerned with lasting weight loss, they are promoting radical changes that only last a short time. 6 Cutting out too many calories at once from your diet can lead to dizziness, heart palpitations, and even a slower metabolism.

7 Some thinkers suggest that fad diets are really a way for us to impose order on our chaotic world, hundreds of food choices, conflicting advice from various health experts. 8 So why diet at all?

How should Sentence 3 be separated?

Possible Answers:

All being key ingredients in recent fad diets. However, since these diets sound promising, few lead to any permanent weight loss.

With them all being key ingredients in recent fad diets. These diets sound promising, few lead to any permanent weight loss.

They are all key ingredients in recent fad diets; since these diets sound promising, few lead to any permanent weight loss. (no change)

They are all key ingredients in recent fad diets, since these diets sound promising, few lead to any permanent weight loss.

They are all key ingredients in recent fad diets. Since these diets sound promising, few lead to any permanent weight loss.

Correct answer:

They are all key ingredients in recent fad diets. Since these diets sound promising, few lead to any permanent weight loss.

Explanation:

The semicolon is already indicating that we have two independent clauses. Because the clauses are presenting fairly separate ideas, it’s best to break them apart even further and make them entirely distinct sentences.

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