Unappreciated ... by Madison

Unappreciated ... by Madison - January 2017 Scholarship Essay

I take a deep, reassuring breath as I face the classroom. It’s my first day with the students; I don't want to embarrass myself. It’s a fearful thought: trying to act the right way and say the right things. I enter the classroom and am amidst kids sprinting for toys, faces set with determination. I’m directed to an area of the room, and stand awkwardly as I try to get a sense of the room and of the kids. I see an adorable girl, I estimate two years-old, sitting at the coloring table by herself. I take this opportunity to try to connect; she seems shy but approachable. As I sit next to her she looks at me warily, eyeing the new presence in her safe space. I try talking to her, try to get her to smile, but she turns her head away. I’m disappointed that my first attempt to connect has failed.
We’re at Mountain Star, a “family relief nursery” that provides at-risk children and their families with therapeutic classes, clothes, food, and more. The kids are usually very timid during a period of time after being dropped off, but they gradually get comfortable and even excited. At the time, I wasn't aware of this. While I was still sitting next to the girl, one of the teachers saw my dismay and enlightened me that the girl was a Spanish-speaker; that’s why she was unresponsive. Having been in Spanish classes for four years, I decided to take my chances and speak to her. Even though my grammar was not perfect, she immediately lit up and started smiling. Through my imperfect Spanish, I allowed myself to be more vulnerable, which made her feel more comfortable and willing to connect.
I had never had a chance to use my Spanish skills outside of class before; it was a new, exciting, and almost terrifying experience. However, it was illuminating to see how much knowing more about other languages and culture can make a difference. Too often people are so involved in themselves and concrete in the way they see the world that everyone seems isolated. To them, connecting with others is not necessary and is not an option. Yet there are people in our own areas, our protected cultural bubbles, that people don't even see.
I have always tried to be a part of volunteering in my community, but before Mountain Star I volunteered more from a distance; I was involved in clubs and fundraisers for others, but never really formed important personal connections. The vulnerability that comes from attempting to speak in a different language or even attempting to connect with these kids has helped enhance and create relationships. From being immersed in this environment, my self-confidence in becoming involved in my community has increased immensely.