SAT Writing : Improving Paragraphs

Study concepts, example questions & explanations for SAT Writing

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Example Questions

Example Question #93 : Separating, Combining, Or Moving Sentences

1 Punk rock developed in the mid-1970s. 2 It was a musical movement that arose out of antiauthoritarian garage bands.3 It was characterized by fast-paced songs, sedimentary lyrics, and a raw loud sound. 4 And often its lyrics were also political. 5 Some of the most famous punk rock bands came from England and the United States and including the Clash, the Sex Pistols, and the Ramones.

6 Punk bands tending to convince a liberal, anti-establishment, sensibility,and they were proponents of individualism, freedom, and nonconformity.7 (Later in the 1990s “riot grrrl” bands like Bikini Kill and Sleater-Kinney used their punk music to draw attention on feminist concerns.)8 Now you can find, punk bands in cities all around the world.9 By the 1980s, the public was beginning to accept punk music, slowly becoming mainstream. 

Where should Sentence 8 be moved?

Possible Answers:

After Sentence 2

After Sentence 5

After Sentence 9

After Sentence 6

It should not be moved.

Correct answer:

After Sentence 9

Explanation:

Sentence 8 serves as a good conclusion for the passage, since it is the most contemporary sentence in a passage arranged chronologically. It does not make sense to include a summing up of where the punk rock movement is "now," and then jump back in time to the 1980s.

Example Question #211 : Improving Paragraphs

1 Lemon juice with cayenne pepper, cabbage soup, cookies, grapefruit. 2 What do these have in common?3 They are all key ingredients in recent fad diets; since these diets sound promising, few lead to any permanent weight loss.4 Some of the worst can even lead to health problems, such as, vitamin deficiencies or anemia. 5 Instead of being concerned with lasting weight loss, they are promoting radical changes that only last a short time. 6 Cutting out too many calories at once from your diet can lead to dizziness, heart palpitations, and even a slower metabolism.

7 Some thinkers suggest that fad diets are really a way for us to impose order on our chaotic world, hundreds of food choices, conflicting advice from various health experts. 8 So why diet at all?

Where should Sentence 8 be moved?

Possible Answers:

before Sentence 3

before Sentence 7

It should not be moved

before Sentence 6

before Sentence 1

Correct answer:

before Sentence 7

Explanation:

Sentence 8 asks a question that Sentence 7 adequately answers, so their order in the passage should be switched.

Example Question #41 : Moving Sentences

There are two different ways to consider the so-called “Dark Ages.” On the one hand, you can think of the period directly after the fall of the Roman Empire, when civilization began to collapse throughout the Western Empire. On the other hand, you can consider the period that followed this initial collapse of society. It is a gross simplification too use the adjective dark to describe the civilization of either of these periods.

As regards the first period, it is quite a simplification to consider this period to be a single historical moment. It is not as though the civilization switched off like a lightbulb. At one moment light and then, at the next, dark. Instead, the decline of civilization occurred over a period of numerous decades and was, in fact, already occurring for many years before the so-called period of darkness. Thus, the decline of civilization was not a rapid collapse into barbarism, but instead, was a slow alteration of the cultural milieu of a partitions of Europe. Indeed, the Eastern Roman Empire retained much of it’s cultural status during these years of decline!

More importantly, the period following the slow collapse of the Western Empire was much less “dark” than almost every popular telling states. Indeed, even during the period of decline, the seeds for cultural restoration was being sown. A key element of this cultural revival were the formation of monastic communities throughout the countryside of what we now know as Europe. Although these were not the only positive force during these centuries, the monasteries had played an important role in preserving and advancing the cause of culture through at least the thirteenth century and arguably until the Renaissance.

To make this paragraph the most logical, the underlined sentence would best be placed ______________________.

Possible Answers:

NO CHANGE

After the sentence that follows it in the passage

At the end of the second paragraph

At the end of the passage

At the end of the first paragraph

Correct answer:

NO CHANGE

Explanation:

The underlined sentence is a perfectly appropriate introductory sentence. It sets out a clear topic, that is then discussed in the rest of the passage. Since this topic describes "two different ways" it contextualizes the use of "on the one hand" in the next sentence. This would clearly be a random and inappropriate concluding sentence, as it would not recap any of the content in enough detail so as to be useful.

Example Question #42 : Moving Sentences

The Moluccas is a chain, or archetype, of islands belonging to Indonesia. Historically, these islands were known as the Spice Islands for their abundance of nutmeg, cloves, mace, and pepper, this profundity of spices eventually drew colonial attention. Spices such as cloves, cinnamon, cardamom, anise, and pepper were particularly popular during the medieval times. In the 1600s, the Spice Wars arose as a result of competing Portuguese and Dutch interest’s in the Spice Islands. The bloody conflict ended in the deaths of many native Moluccans as well as European traders, wherefore both Portugal and the Netherlands gained and lost territories ranging from Africa and South America. For this day, strife occasionally breaks out on the islands although it is now motivated by religious and not colonial disagreements. It is located just west of New Guinea in the Pacific Ocean, and its more than 1,000 islands are home to more than 2 million people today.

Where should the underlined sentence be moved in the passage?

Possible Answers:

After the second sentence

The sentence in question cannot be moved while maintaining the logical and grammatical flow of the passage

After the third sentence

To the opening of the passage, becoming the very first sentence

After the first sentence

Correct answer:

After the first sentence

Explanation:

The final sentence, "It is located just west of New Guinea in the Pacific Ocean, and its more than 1,000 islands are home to more than 2 million people today," presents basic introductory information, so it belongs closer to the beginning of the passage; however, since it begins with a pronoun (“It”) lacking a referent, it would make more sense to place the sentence immediately after a sentence in which the pronoun’s referent is introduced. This would mean that the final sentence should be moved to become the second sentence of the paragraph, in order to make logical and grammatical sense.

Example Question #415 : Sat Writing

There once was a shepherd boy whom sat on the hillside watching the village sheep. He was hot and exhausted fanning himself, rapidly in a feeble attempt to cool himself down. On top of that, he had never been so bored before. To amuse himself, he decided to play a joke. He put his hands around his mouth and yelled in a loud voice, "Wolf! Wolf! A wolf is chasing the sheep!”

They came running. They asked the boy, “What’s going on? Did you yell ‘A wolf is chasing the sheep?’”

The boy laughed. “It was just a joke, everyone.”

The people fumed, but they all returned to their homes.

The next day, the boy bored again decided to amuse himself again. He bellowed, “Wolf! Wolf!” Again, the townspeople came running. Once they arrived and witnessed the laughing boy, they realized they’d been tricked a second time. Nonetheless, they returned home and irritated resolved to never fall for the trick again for third time.

The next day, the boy was watching his sheep. Suddenly, out of nowhere, a wolf appeared from behind the bushes. With its teeth bared, the boy cowered as the wolf approached the sheep. Terrified, he called, “Help! A wolf! A wolf is here!” The people ignored his cries. “That mischievous boy,” they all said to one another. “He must think he can fool us again.” But not one of them came running.

No one was there to witness as the wolf ate every last sheep on the hillside, as the boy helplessly cowered behind a bush. As the boy hid, he shook his head. “I shall never fib again,” he resolved to himself.

To where should the underlined sentence be moved, so as to best fit the logical flow and content of the paragraph?

Possible Answers:

NO CHANGE

At the end of the first paragraph

After the sentence that currently follows it

To the end of the paragraph it currently opens

To the beginning of the final paragraph

Correct answer:

NO CHANGE

Explanation:

The sentence introduces the third instance of the boy crying wolf, it logically and chronologically follows from what precedes it. None of the suggestions for moving the sentence make sense, or follow in the flow of the writing. The sentence is in its correct place in the paragraph.

Example Question #15 : Improving Paragraphs

     (1) The sport of lacrosse, while perhaps not as widely popular today in the United States as baseball or football, is far older. (2) These games served many important cultural functions. (3) They were used to settle disputes between tribes, as festival events, and to train young men to become warriors and hunters.

     (4) Hundreds of men and women from rival tribes or villages would gather to play at once. (5) The playing field was sometimes several miles long. (6) The original game was very different from the organized sport played today. (7) A single game would be played from dawn until sunset, and be followed by dancing and feasting.

     (8) Modern, standardized versions of lacrosse started to be played in the 1850s and soon became very popular throughout Canada and the United States. (9) For over a century, it has been one of the most widely played sports in high schools in both nations.

The author wishes to add a concluding sentence after Sentence 9 that relates to a statement made in the opening sentence. Which of the following sentences would achieve this most effectively?

Possible Answers:

Lacrosse has played an important role in North American culture for hundreds of years.

Changes to the game have been made to improve safety, such as the addition of helmets and padding for the players, and the use of a rubber ball.

Lacrosse is a difficult sport to play because it requires much more physical endurance than baseball.

Though it may not be considered "America's pastime," lacrosse could certainly be called the original American team sport.

If you haven't ever played lacrosse, you're missing out on a really fun game.

Correct answer:

Though it may not be considered "America's pastime," lacrosse could certainly be called the original American team sport.

Explanation:

The sentence "Though it may not be considered 'America's pastime,' lacrosse could certainly be called the original American team sport" is best because it echoes both the reference to baseball and the assertion of lacrosse's longevity made in Sentence 1.

Example Question #212 : Improving Paragraphs

     (1) The sport of lacrosse, while perhaps not as widely popular today in the United States as baseball or football, is far older. (2) These games served many important cultural functions. (3) They were used to settle disputes between tribes, as festival events, and to train young men to become warriors and hunters.

     (4) Hundreds of men and women from rival tribes or villages would gather to play at once. (5) The playing field was sometimes several miles long. (6) The original game was very different from the organized sport played today. (7) A single game would be played from dawn until sunset, and be followed by dancing and feasting.

     (8) Modern, standardized versions of lacrosse started to be played in the 1850s and soon became very popular throughout Canada and the United States. (9) For over a century, it has been one of the most widely played sports in high schools in both nations.

What would be the best sentence to insert between Sentence 1 and Sentence 2?

Possible Answers:

Numerous Native American tribes, including the Iroquois, Cherokee, and Onondaga have played versions of it for at least 400 years.

However, the game has faced a lot of criticism over the years due to its violent nature.

Consequently, professional lacrosse players are not paid the same salaries as baseball players.

The first modern lacrosse league was organized in Montreal in 1856.

The sport has quickly gained popularity in recent years.

Correct answer:

Numerous Native American tribes, including the Iroquois, Cherokee, and Onondaga have played versions of it for at least 400 years.

Explanation:

The sentence "Numerous Native American tribes, including the Iroquois, Cherokee, and Onondaga have played versions of it for at least 400 years" creates the best transition between the two other sentences and adds key information which clarifies the passage, introducing where and when the game originated.

Example Question #423 : Sat Writing

(1) Cowboys have long been a symbol in American society. (2) On the one hand, they represent American strength, adventurousness, and indefatigability. (3) But they also call up images of oppression, racism, and exploitation. (4) However, both of these romanticized views of cowboys betray the dull routine and everyday realities of the lives that many cowboys lived.

(5) Some cowboys worked at the same farms for much of their lives, while others periodically moved cattle from place to place without ever participating in a gun fight or being harangued by unexpected or hidden enemies. (6) Today, their figurative descendants can still be found living in agricultural areas, working hard to ensure that steady supplies of milk, meat and other agricultural products find their ways to stores and your dining room table.

Which of the following would be the best spot to insert the sentence "Many times, they dealt with disease, hunger and loneliness."?

Possible Answers:

Before Sentence 5

Between Sentence 5 and Sentence 6

Between Sentence 3 and Sentence 4

Before Sentence 1

Between Sentence 2 and Sentence 3

Correct answer:

Between Sentence 5 and Sentence 6

Explanation:

"Between Sentences 5 and 6" is the best answer because Sentence 5 marks the beginning of the description of the real life of the cowboy, while Sentence 6 focuses more on the contemporary existence of people that fit the cowboy image. The clause being inserted refers to the past lives of the cowboys but is not necessarily part of the idealized image in the first paragraph, excluding this location as a possibility.

Example Question #3 : Inserting Or Deleting Content

[1] Modern ice hockey was developed in Canada during the nineteenth century. [2] Two students from McGill University came up with the first rules. [3] A couple of years later, the sport made its way to the United States. [4] The game became a part of the Olympics in 1924.

[5] I first learned about hockey during the sixth grade. [6] When I watched my first game on the television. [7] After that first game, I begged my parents to let me play. [8] They agreed, and I started playing on my first team later that year.

[9] For the first year, I was not very good. [10] I could barely skate! [11] However, after years of practicing, I finally made it on to my high school varsity team. [12] Ice hockey was first played in the United States by universities. [13] Now, as I start applying to colleges, I hope to be able to play for my college. [14] I want to continue playing to achieve my dream of playing for the United States Olympic ice hockey team.

Which of the following is the best place to insert the following sentence?

"I started playing as a forward, but eventually, I became a goalie."

Possible Answers:

After sentence 13

After sentence 8

After sentence 5

After sentence 14

After sentence 11

Correct answer:

After sentence 8

Explanation:

The given sentence deals with the writer's start with playing ice hockey. Thus, it must be in the second paragraph because that paragraph describes how the author started playing ice hockey.

The sentence does not make much sense if it is inserted after Sentence 5 because at that point in the essay, the writer has not made it clear that he or she started playing ice hockey.

Example Question #4 : Inserting Content

[1] American architecture has many distinctive styles and signature elements. [2] While perhaps newer than its counterparts, Southwestern architecture draws on Spanish and Native American influences that are hundreds or thousands of years old. [3] These influences can be seen in the use of native building materials such as adobe and pine timber, both easily found in the Southwest, and in the use of a central plaza or veranda. [4] Traditional building elements include walls with rounded corners, exposed timber beams, flat roofs, and a simple, uncluttered aesthetic. [5] Some houses are built around a central courtyard; while others open onto a patio flanked by ornate grillwork. 

[6] Pueblo Revival buildings are dignified by their vigas, which are roof beams that extend beyond the outer edge of walls. [7] Recessed windows and doorways with arched tops are also very common in this style of architecture. [8] Some famous examples of Pueblo Revival buildings include the New Mexico Museum of Art, the Painted Desert Inn, and various edifices at the University of New Mexico in Santa Fe.

The sentence “For example, the Southern plantation home is characterized by neoclassical proportions and exterior columns, while the New England saltbox has a long, slanting roof and a flat façade.” would best be inserted between which two sentences?

Possible Answers:

Sentences 5 and 6

Sentences 7 and 8

Sentences 4 and 5

Sentences 3 and 4

Sentences 1 and 2

Correct answer:

Sentences 1 and 2

Explanation:

This sentence elaborates upon an idea introduced in Sentence 1 (the variety of American architectural styles) and provides a seamless transition to Sentence 2.

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