With A Little Determination... by Tahlia

With A Little Determination... by Tahlia - September 2014 Scholarship Essay

“The difference between the impossible and the possible lies in a man’s determination”-Tommy Lasorda

My heart sank as Professor Schulman handed out another take-home test to my Math Modeling for Business class. This was the third take-home test he had assigned and each one had seemed more difficult than the last. I was thankful that it was not due for another week but dreaded the thought of the hours I would need to spend answering the fifty questions.

To say math is not my best subject is an understatement. I was the last student in my third grade class to master my multiplication tables, I had struggled with algebra in high school, and the only math class I had taken thus far in college was a remedial math course. Math Modeling for Business was a requirement for my major and I had postponed enrolling in it for as long as I could. My grade for the course was determined by my scores on the four take-home tests. The first two had been difficult, involving hours of careful calculation, and I had barely managed to get a passing grade. As I surveyed the questions on the third test, I became increasingly more discouraged. I could hardly understand what the questions were asking, let alone calculate the answer accurately. I left class feeling absolutely deflated. I slipped my headphones on and put my Ipod on shuffle as I walked home, hardly hearing the music as I thought about the prospect of failing the class. Would I have to take the course again? What if I failed it twice? What if I wouldn’t be able to graduate? My head was spinning but amidst my storm of thoughts, I heard the words of one of my favorite songs streaming through my headphones, “Don't stop, no it's never enough. I'll never look back, never give up. And if it gets rough, it's time to get rough”. Right then and there, I decided I would not fail. I had no idea how I was going to do it but I was determined to succeed.

When I got home, I came up with a plan of action. I made a weekly appointment with a tutor. I talked to classmates and compared notes. I spent hours on Youtube watching tutorials about compound interest, logarithms, and probability. I checked and rechecked my answers. Little by little, the questions that had previously seemed to be written in gibberish made sense. I did calculations, checked, and rechecked my answers, getting the same result each time. It was exhilarating and I became almost addicted to the thrill of figuring questions out. Is this what it’s like to enjoy math, I thought to myself?

When I handed in my test, I waited with bated breath for Professor Schulman to correct it. I was surprised and elated when he handed back the test with only a few questions marked wrong. I had earned an A!

When Professor Schulman handed out the fourth and final test a few weeks later, I was actually excited. The subject matter had not gotten easier. If anything it had just gotten more difficult, but I no longer saw the test as an opportunity to fail. I saw it as a challenge to succeed. I spent over ten hours that week working on the test. And it paid off. I got another A.

When final grades came out, I was ecstatic to see that Math Modeling for Business was my best class. But more rewarding than the letter grade I received, was the pride I felt for not giving up and persevering despite feeling so overwhelmed.

It taught me a valuable lesson; nothing is insurmountable if you try hard and use the resources available. That determination is the same quality I’ve used when faced with other, more serious challenges. When I was diagnosed with an autoimmune disease that caused intestinal damage, I remembered that math class. When my mother was unemployed and I realized that I had to pay for college out of pocket without any support from my parents, I remembered that math class. And when I think about the challenges that lie ahead of me, I’m not overwhelmed, I’m excited. I know that life is not always easy but I’ve learned that I can accomplish things I never would have imaged. Determination propels me forward and has turned “impossible” into a word I no longer know the meaning of.