Don't feel stupid. Just ask. by Sydney

Don't feel stupid. Just ask. by Sydney - February 2017 Scholarship Essay

In 2015 I started my junior year in high school. I took Pre-Calculus with two people my age and nine others that were all seniors. I did not like to talk to the older kids because I believed they would find me annoying or that I would sound stupid. So, my plan was to stay quiet and learn on my own. After all, if I ever needed help I could always go ask for it after school. I had music classes sandwiching Pre-Calculus and since I love music, I knew that a band class before would relax me and one after would take away any stress I felt after my math class. I thought I would be fine working on my own. Sadly, I was wrong...

Pre-Calculus was crazy for me! Not understanding what was going on in the class was normal. I would drag my feet every day after Jazz band, dreading my next class. I would enter the class, sit on the left side of the room, and hope and pray the teacher would not call on me. I specifically remember my teacher using all three boards to explain to me and to my classmates what a parabola was or what logarithms where. Most often, the class was silent, except for a very few questions that I could not follow. Almost every day I would leave the class and run to my next class where I would freak out and cry. I learned from the very first day in that class how hard math can be. Frustrated and scared of failing, I stayed after school every day trying to get a small grasp on the topic we learned that day.

This went on all year. I would not understand what was being taught in the class and not say anything. Then I would go in after school and beg the teacher for extra help. Towards the end of the year my teacher told me that it is okay to ask questions in class, and that if I had a question, more than likely someone else also had the same question. He also told me that answering questions incorrectly was the way we learn. Though I believed him, I just could not build up the nerve to raise my hand, so I remained quiet in class. I thankfully passed my Pre-Calculus class with a C, thanks to my very understanding and kind teacher. Not great but I passed...

I retook Pre-Calculus this year. I could not be satisfied with a C. Learning from last year's mistakes, I decided to this year, take a different approach to this class. I decided to ask questions, all kinds of questions, and this has helped me learn and better understand the subject. It has also made math a little easier and fun for me. I have had more than one of my classmates thank me for asking a question they needed answered but, like me last year, could not find the courage to ask. Pre-Calculus is still hard. I still need to go in after school for help, just not every day. Last year this class made my band classes less fun because I stressed myself out by not asking questions. This year, I'm able to understand my math class better. I've overcome my inability to ask questions in class and that has made Pre-Calculus less stressful. I can once again enjoy other classes that I love. I am of course in band again this year, but because my math class isn't stressing me out like it did last year I can once again -as in years past- enjoy that class too.