The power of effective body language by Kaleb

The power of effective body language by Kaleb - July 2017 Scholarship Essay

We as a people yearn for connection. We hunger to be understood. We seek attachment in relationships. We strive for strength and stability in friendships. Because of our interdependence with others, it is important to develop effective social skills to connect with others in meaningful ways. One extremely powerful aspect of interpersonal connection is body language. In fact, body language is so powerful that if our words do not match our body language, people will discount what we say. As we learn effective body language we can establish better relationships, reach higher levels of understanding, feel more confident, and influence more of our friends and associates.
Improving our body language requires a desire to change our habits. Our body language is generally processed automatically by programmed habits in our subconscious. Studies indicate that many of these programs have not changed much since age eleven. This is problematic because we have significantly changed how we speak and how we desire to interact with the world since age eleven. As we realize our body language is be holding us back from those results we desire so much in life, we can have the power to move forward to action.
Fortunately, we can upgrade our programmed body language habits by proactively changing our response to situations. We can identify our weaker body language responses we habitually do and decide what we want to do differently. We can proactively readjust to our new plan when our weak programs automatically engage. Pretty soon, our subconscious replaces the old programs with our powerful new ones. We feel different and more empowered. The people around us receive the new message we are giving off and our interpersonal results expand. Then we can have the aforementioned opportunities for better relationships, higher levels of understanding, increased confidence, and the ability to lead our teammates to success.
On a personal note, body language changed who I am. Much of my life I have stood resting on one leg or leaning against something while speaking to people. Leaning felt natural and comfortable. However, leaning was making me feel weak, small, and off balance. This pose was also sending a message to others that I was lacking confidence and self-esteem. When I realized what message I was sending by leaning, I proactively worked to upgrade this programmed habit. Immediately I felt happier and empowered. Others saw my new body language and immediately responded in welcoming and open ways. I finally felt I was receiving the results I was looking for in my relationships with others.
This is the power of effective body language. This power can be yours too as you nourish a desire to improve and then proactively change your body language. You too can immediately receive the results you yearn for in your relationships. You too can feel connected and understood. Thank you.