Lesson learned from failing by Derrick

Lesson learned from failing by Derrick - February 2017 Scholarship Essay

Failure is not something that I take lightly. I strive to always do my best and be successful, but sometimes that just doesn’t happen. One particular time that I felt like I had failed happened during my sophomore year of high school.

I moved from third base to catcher for the varsity baseball team. I was a first year starter and with this new job came more pressure than I ever thought possible. Throughout the season I worked hard and built up confidence. Our team had a pretty successful season and was honored to host the 1st round of the state playoffs. Unfortunately, the weather wouldn’t cooperate and it seemed as if we were not meant to play. It rained so much that we were unable to prepare our field. As a result, we had to move the games to the Jacksonville State University baseball field. We lost that home field advantage, and I lost the confidence that I had worked so hard to acquire all season long. I knew that the backstop on JSU’s field was much deeper than any field we had played on all year. This was going to be a problem. The day of the games my mom drove me to JSU. On the way there I didn’t say a word. She kept asking me what was wrong and all I could tell her was I was sick to my stomach. I was more nervous than I had ever been and I knew that I was going to have passed balls and errors. The fate of the game was on my shoulders, and I knew I was going to be the reason we lost the game. We arrive at the field and I was still a nervous wreck. The game started and all of my fears were coming true. I made more errors than I had made the entire season. I knew we were going to lose the game and it was going to be my fault. Somehow my teammates managed to pull a win out, but I knew that I had failed. I failed myself, but more importantly, I had failed my teammates, my friends, my brothers.

Between games I spent some time alone thinking. I didn’t want to talk to anyone and most of my teammates did not want to talk to me. A few came to me and told me to calm down and pull it together. I thought about what we had worked so hard for all season long. We all wanted to play for a state championship, and they were right. I had to calm down, stop questioning my ability, get out there and do my job. We had gotten to this point as a team and we would win or lose this series as a team. I couldn’t take responsibility alone. The second game I played with the confidence of a pro. We won and we were going to play in the 2nd round.

That day I realized I am only one person and I cannot take the weight of the world (or baseball playoffs) solely on my shoulders. I was part of a team and as a team we could do anything. I needed to lean on my teammates and not worry that I was going to end their season. Learning to overcome my nervousness and fear of failure was not easy and did not end that weekend. I have worked on it every day.

During the 2nd round I played better than I had ever played. I went 6 for 8 at the plate with 8 RBI’s. The entire team showed out that weekend. We didn’t make it to the state championship, but our success and failure was earned as a team.