YOU are Worth it by Brianna

YOU are Worth it by Brianna - March 2017 Scholarship Essay

Have you ever felt like no matter how hard you try, nothing is ever good enough? It seems like nowadays kids in high school are so focused on what others think of them and what other people’s ideas of happiness are, that it controls the way they live their lives. What seems to matter now is how popular you are, who your boyfriend/girlfriend is, and what you do on the weekend. Let me tell you from experience, “fitting in” and following the “social norm” is not the answer. As a student from a tiny, small-town school, I will tell you that clicks and/or social “norms” are always going to be around, but what you make of your time while you are in high school or anywhere else is what really matters. Insecurities seem to control people’s happiness and that shouldn’t be the case. You are the only person who can control your happiness, so why waste your time trying to be someone you’re not?
Throughout high school, I’ve learned that being who you are is truly the key to happiness, and I’ve learned that I am worth it. My dreams, my goals, and my passions are all worth it and so are yours. There’s no need to feel insecure about who you are because you are unique and there is no one else in the world like you. You are the only person who can live to follow your passions and dreams, so make your time worth it and don’t ever look back. Have confidence in yourself, work hard to achieve your goals, and don’t let your failures bring you down because in the end you are worth it. I’ve had the privilege of learning those lessons through experience, and I wouldn’t be the same confident individual I am today if I hadn’t gone through tough times that shaped who I have become.
At the age of 14 entering high school, I didn’t know what to expect. I was considered a typical popular high school teenager-- a “straight A” student, class president, and 2 sport varsity athlete as a freshman. Although it may seem like having those attributes would make me happy-- I truly wasn’t. I was the type of person who didn’t have many friends, lacked self-confidence entirely, and didn’t know where to turn when it came to handling my problems.
Everyday I struggled with getting out of bed because I felt so different from everyone else and it killed me inside. I wanted to fit in so badly that I let it control who I was. I was very insecure because I was (and still am) bigger and taller than most girls. At the time, all I could focus on was being like everyone else, and I wasn’t happy because it was physically impossible. I based my happiness off of what everyone else thought happiness was, and I made everyday about trying to achieve their idea of happiness. I let my obsession with what other people thought of me and what other people’s opinion of what happiness was take over my life, and it caused some major problems.
In high school, it seemed like having a boyfriend/girlfriend was so important, so everyday I tried to find someone so I could be happy. Eventually I ended up with someone who was much older than me and became abusive. Finally the idea of being happy was in my hands, but it wasn’t exactly what I thought it would be like. I completely had changed who I was for this person and still wasn’t happy with myself. I had done everything I could to try to be happy like everyone else, but it wasn’t good enough. That thought, plus the abuse, put me into a depression.
Everyday became a challenge for me, and I questioned whether or not I was worth it. The abuse I experienced became a court case and caused a lot of negative attention to be drawn towards me at school. Everyday was a struggle to find a reason to keep moving forward, and it was very hard to convince myself that I would ever feel happy again. I had hit rock bottom and although it was miserable, I knew that I could only go up from there.
I started setting goals for myself for motivation to get through the days. I constantly kept telling myself that what other people thought of me didn’t matter and if I worked hard, it would pay off in the future. I discovered my passions and developed aspirations that kept me going everyday. Eventually, I was able to see that if I worked hard to achieve what I wanted to achieve, it would make me happy, rather than trying to fit in.
If I was able to give a speech to a school-wide audience, I would tell them that their dreams, their happiness, and their futures are all worth it. I would tell the audience my story and let them know that it's okay to be different and that it's okay to fall down as long as they get back up. I would tell them to never give up and be confident in themselves because there is no one else like them. I would tell them to be who they are and chase after their dreams, and most importantly, I would preach that they are worth it.