SAT Writing : Improving Sentences
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Example Questions
Example Question #121 : Correcting Punctuation Errors: Commas
The athlete, a respected team leader was always the first person in the locker room before a game.
The athlete, a respected team leader, was
The athlete, a respected team leader having been
The athlete, a respected team leader was
The athlete, the respected team leader was
The athlete a respected team leader was
The athlete, a respected team leader, was
The phrase "a respected team leader" is what is known as an interrupting phrase, or a phrase that provides information but is unnecessary for the structure of the sentence. All interrupting phrases must be set apart from the rest of the sentence by commas; therefore, the correct answer is "The athlete, a respected team leader, was."
Example Question #3 : Commas
There once was a shepherd boy whom sat on the hillside watching the village sheep. He was hot and exhausted fanning himself, rapidly in a feeble attempt to cool himself down. On top of that, he had never been so bored before. To amuse himself, he decided to play a joke. He put his hands around his mouth and yelled in a loud voice, "Wolf! Wolf! A wolf is chasing the sheep!”
They came running. They asked the boy, “What’s going on? Did you yell ‘A wolf is chasing the sheep?’”
The boy laughed. “It was just a joke, everyone.”
The people fumed, but they all returned to their homes.
The next day, the boy bored again decided to amuse himself again. He bellowed, “Wolf! Wolf!” Again, the townspeople came running. Once they arrived and witnessed the laughing boy, they realized they’d been tricked a second time. Nonetheless, they returned home and irritated resolved to never fall for the trick again for third time.
The next day, the boy was watching his sheep. Suddenly, out of nowhere, a wolf appeared from behind the bushes. With its teeth bared, the boy cowered as the wolf approached the sheep. Terrified, he called, “Help! A wolf! A wolf is here!” The people ignored his cries. “That mischievous boy,” they all said to one another. “He must think he can fool us again.” But not one of them came running.
No one was there to witness as the wolf ate every last sheep on the hillside, as the boy helplessly cowered behind a bush. As the boy hid, he shook his head. “I shall never fib again,” he resolved to himself.
How should the underlined section be corrected?
they returned home and irritated, resolved
they returned home and irritated resolved,
they returned home and irritably resolving
they returned home and, irritated, resolved
NO CHANGE
they returned home and, irritated, resolved
The word "irritated" is an interrupter, and should be set off by commas on either side. Adding a comma after "irritated" makes the first part of the phrase "they returned home and irritated," which is incorrect as "returned" and "irritated" are not parallel.
Changing the phrase to "irritably resolving" ruins the parallelism of the sentence, with "resolving" not matching "returned". Adding a comma to the end of the phrase does not fix the issue of the interrupter, and it also ruins parallelism by making "returned" and "irritated" a pair. Therefore, the only correct answer is "they returned home and, irritated, resolved."
Example Question #561 : Correcting Punctuation Errors
Replace the underlined portion with the answer choice that results in a sentence that is clear, precise, and meets the requirements of standard written English.
The musician, capable of playing a dozen instruments needed a larger than normal space for all of his gear.
The musician, capable of playing a dozen instruments, needed
The musician, capable of playing, a dozen instruments needed
The musician, capable of playing a dozen instruments needed
The musician capable of playing a dozen instruments, needed
The musician capable of playing a dozen instruments needed
The musician, capable of playing a dozen instruments, needed
The phrase "capable of playing a dozen instruments" is an interrupting phrase, one that adds extra information to a sentence, but sits outside the main structure of the sentence. Any interrupting phrase must be set apart from the rest of the sentence by commas. "The musician, capable of playing a dozen instruments, needed" is the only answer choice that correctly sets off the interrupting phrase.
Example Question #141 : Correcting Punctuation Errors
Replace the underlined portion with the answer choice that results in a sentence that is clear, precise, and meets the requirements of standard written English.
The fourth place finisher at the Olympics receives nothing, but the satisfaction of representing their country and competing.
The fourth place finisher at the Olympics receives nothing, but the satisfaction of represented his or her country and competing.
The fourth place finisher at the Olympics receives nothing but the satisfaction of representing his or her country and competing.
The fourth place finisher at the Olympics receives nothing, but the satisfaction of representing his or her country, and competing.
The fourth place finisher at an Olympics receives nothing, but the satisfaction of representing his or her country and competing.
The fourth place finisher at the Olympics receives nothing, but the satisfaction of representing his or her country and competing.
The fourth place finisher at the Olympics receives nothing but the satisfaction of representing his or her country and competing.
Inserting a comma between "nothing" and "but" is incorrect, as the sentence is one complete thought, and should not be broken up by a comma. The only thing that needs to be changed is that the comma needs to be removed from the sentence. Therefore, the correct answer choice is "The fourth place finisher at the Olympics receives nothing but the satisfaction of representing his or her country and competing."
Example Question #1 : Correcting Punctuation Errors: Commas For Dependent Clauses
The manager had the deplorable habit of spitting constantly wherever he felt like it.
spits constantly wherever he felt like it.
spitting constantly, wherever he felt like it.
spitting constantly wherever he feels like it.
spitting constantly wherever he felt like it.
spits constantly, wherever he felt like it.
spitting constantly, wherever he felt like it.
The phrase "wherever he felt like it" is a dependent clause that explains more about the main body of the sentence. All dependent clauses must be set apart from the rest of the sentence by a comma. As such, "spitting constantly, wherever he felt like it" is the correct answer choice.
Example Question #562 : Correcting Punctuation Errors
Replace the underlined portion with the answer choice that results in a sentence that is clear, precise, and meets the requirements of standard written English.
The issue proved to be a hot topic for years as ten years later it was still being debated in leading universities.
The issue proved to be a hot topic for years and ten years later it was still being debated in leading universities.
The issue proved to be a hot topic for years, ten years later it was still being debated in leading universities.
The issue proved to be a hot topic for years, as ten years later it was still being debated in leading universities.
The issue proved to be a hot topic for years as ten years later it was still being debated in leading universities.
The issue proved to be a hot topic for years so ten years later it was still being debated in leading universities.
The issue proved to be a hot topic for years, as ten years later it was still being debated in leading universities.
The sentence in the question is a compound sentence, one that joins two complete thoughts to show their relationship to each other. While the conjunction "as" connects the two parts, it also needs a comma to join the two thoughts together correctly. Therefore, the correct answer choice is "The issue proved to be a hot topic for years, as ten years later it was still being debated in leading universities."
Example Question #2 : Correcting Punctuation Errors: Commas For Dependent Clauses
Replace the underlined portion with the answer choice that results in a sentence that is clear, precise, and meets the requirements of standard written English.
Home cooks are at a disadvantage to professional chefs because the quality of their equipment is not at the same level.
Home cooks, are at a disadvantage to professional chefs, because the quality of their equipment is not at the same level.
Home cooks are at a disadvantage to professional chefs, because the quality of their equipment is not at the same level.
Home cooks are at a disadvantage to professional chefs because the quality of their equipment, not at the same level.
Home cooks are at a disadvantage to professional chefs because the quality of their equipment is not at the same level.
Home cooks are at a disadvantage to professional chefs as the quality of their equipment is not at the same level.
Home cooks are at a disadvantage to professional chefs, because the quality of their equipment is not at the same level.
The sentence is written as a compound sentence, containing two complete independent clauses, but does not properly connect them. A compound sentence must be connected either by a semicolon or a comma and conjunction, which in this sentence is "because." Therefore, the correct answer choice is "Home cooks are at a disadvantage to professional chefs, because the quality of their equipment is not at the same level."
Example Question #671 : Act English
Under the circumstances, people were completely willing to eat the poor meat as it was all they had to eat.
the poor meat as it was all they had for eating.
the poor meat it was all they had to eat.
the poor meat, as it was all they had to eat.
the poor meat was all they had to eat.
the poor meat as it was all they had to eat.
the poor meat, as it was all they had to eat.
The phrase "as it was all they had to eat" is used as an explanatory phrase, which is unnecessary to the construction of the sentence. Such a phrase needs to be set apart from the rest of the sentence by a comma; therefore, the correct answer is "the poor meat, as it was all they had to eat."
Example Question #672 : Act English
Replace the underlined portion with the answer choice that results in a sentence that is clear, precise, and meets the requirements of standard written English. One of the answer choices reproduces the underlined portion as it is written in the sentence.
Unlike his contemporaries, the author abhorred fancy displays of his verbal acuity preferring to use simplified language.
displaying of his verbal acuity preferring to use simplified language.
displays of his verbal acuity preferring to use a simplified language.
displays of his verbal acuity preferring to use simplifying language.
displays of his verbal acuity preferring to use simplified language.
displays of his verbal acuity, preferring to use simplified language.
displays of his verbal acuity, preferring to use simplified language.
The phrase "preferring to use simplifying language" is a dependent clause, a clause that cannot be used as a complete sentence but instead relies on other information. Although it cannot stand alone, it still needs to be separated from the rest of the sentence by a comma; therefore, the correct answer is " displays of his verbal acuity, preferring to use simplified language."
Example Question #1 : Correcting Punctuation Errors: Commas For Dependent Clauses
Replace the underlined portion with the answer choice that results in a sentence that is clear, precise, and meets the requirements of standard written English. One of the answer choices reproduces the underlined portion as it is written in the sentence.
No one had a better curveball than the youngest kid which allowed him to compete with bigger boys in baseball.
than the youngest of the kids that allowed him
than the youngest kid, which allowing him
than the youngest kid, which allowed him
than the youngest kid that allowed him
than the youngest kid which allowed him
than the youngest kid, which allowed him
The only problem with the sentence is that it is a compound sentence, shoved into a run on sentence. The sentence consists of two complete thoughts, joined by the conjunction "which." All such sentences must be divided by a comma before the conjunction, making "than the youngest kid, which allowed him" the correct answer choice.
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