One Step at a Time by Sarah

One Step at a Time by Sarah - May 2021 Scholarship Essay

I am a child with a disability. I was diagnosed with Spina Bifida before birth, and doctors told my parents to expect a physically and mentally incompetent child. I was supposed to be integrated into Special Education classrooms paralyzed from the waist down with others doubting my comprehension of the material being taught to me. However, this did not happen and through the support of doctors and family, I lead a pretty ordinary life. I take AP classes, participate in clubs such as choir and the school speech team, and have a job. I hang out with friends, exercise, and find time for myself as well through activities such as coloring and reading. On the outside, I’m any other teenager attempting to balance a million responsibilities with very little motivation.
As miraculous as my life has been this does not change the fact that I do have a disability and that does affect the activities that I am a part of. I have to take sitting breaks frequently as my legs get tired easily, and because the lower half of my body is not as strong as others I can’t participate in some activities that my classes do. I can’t stand on my toes during choir warm-ups, I can’t run during fun races, and I can’t even take gym classes. I have to take extra time out of my day to use the bathroom as I have to use special equipment, such as catheters, to help me use the bathroom, and because of the fear I have to hide my supplies as if I’ll get in trouble for having them just so others won’t see it and question. I have to take extra days off of school to attend routine doctor's appointments and procedures, which brings on more responsibilities to teach missed lessons to myself and stay on top of homework that was assigned while I was gone.
The physical side of my disability is not the one that affects me the most. When others mention people with disabilities you think of what is physically wrong. I understand that every person who has a disability also has to fight mentally as well. At seventeen years old I have to deal with the fact that others see me as inferior because I am different from them. I have to deal with the fact that my community struggles to bring in income due to a lack of job opportunities for people with disabilities. I have to wrap my head around the idea that no matter how old I am I will always deal with bullies who will never understand my story, and most importantly do not wish to hear my side. I have been bullied since I was in first grade, and I still face harassment due to my disability to this day. I have to understand that a majority of my classmates have no idea what it’s like to have a disability, and simply don’t care to. I have to deal with the fact that because of misconceptions a majority of my classmates have that they are the people who use harsh rhetoric to criticize people who are different from them. While I understand their intentions are not cruel it doesn't necessarily get any easier. Sometimes you just become numb to it.
However, I do not view my circumstance as a limitation. I have learned how to be a diligent student, leader, and worker because of my disability. Instead of being frustrated that I have to do what most of my peers don't have to, I look at what I am doing now that I wasn't supposed to. Instead of being saddened that I have to bear witness to words and actions that my peers don't have to, I choose to continue to speak out about my story and give a voice to those in the community who either can't or are too scared to. I choose to recognize the skills my disability has provided me with and use my privilege to make the world around me a better place. It takes one person to start a change. I hope that through spreading awareness about the hardships people with disabilities face, others will join me in ensuring that they leave the world a better place than they found it.