Dear Grandma by Oriana

Dear Grandma by Oriana - September 2024 Scholarship Essay

This may sound weird… but my favorite non-traditional way to learn is by reading the material of course, but as I read, I draw circles beside me. They’re not neat either. I just draw circles around and around and around until my wrist is tired. It is very strange to someone outside of my head but to me, it is very stimulating. It makes me feel like I am taking in the information as I go and it keeps me from getting distracted, as I can be very easily distracted, even by little things. I also do this outside of learning material at school just because it is a very soothing experience for me. What I am currently learning outside of school is to appreciate the life around you while you can before it is gone.
When I go out, I bring my notebook with me and draw circles while I take in the nature around me. I always make sure to label the circle drawings with the date because they truly help me remember things. I can look at one and remember exactly where I was and how I felt in that moment. The neater ones usually represent me when I was in a good mood and the more uglier, aggressive ones represents me in an angry mood, but I had a strange one that looks like neither. It was from May of 2021, which was around the time my grandmother had passed away. The circle wasn’t all over the place like my usual ones, it was just a singular circle. It was in the shape of a text bubble as well. It says, quote, “You were the best thing that has ever happened to me.” Those were the last words my grandmother told me before she died.
We had a very close relationship up until I started middle school, which is when I started to drift away from family and more towards friends. I always think about this as I wish I spent more time with my grandma before she died. I appreciated her more than I thought I did, but when I look at that specific paper, it makes me feel like I didn’t. Soon, emotions revolving that paper became extremely heavy and would cause me to go into a deep depression. I had to throw it away because it would cause me a sense of guilt and sadness. Did I really appreciate her? I always ask myself this. I know I did but I don’t feel like I appreciated her enough. I was her world and she was mine too, but the excitement of friendship took the time I could have spent with my grandmother away from me.
As I got older and realized how much I did appreciate my grandmother for the special moments between us, my circles started to become neater. They were less angry and had a happier feel to them. I started to appreciate all of the life around me, and not just the ones that brought me excitement. This was when I began to learn my objective. Even today, I am still practicing and learning, but I appreciate everything that comes my way all because of my grandmother. I love you, Violet Watson.