Take a Moment to Breathe. by Nylah

Take a Moment to Breathe. by Nylah - September 2022 Scholarship Essay

The car lurches forward on the highway with my mom at the wheel. I’m bickering with my sister in the backseat about whatever ten-year-olds argue about. The car slams to a stop as my mother rams into the back of a vehicle. I look at my sister as she's carried off into the ambulance, my throat closing when a question pops into my mind, what if the argument is the last thing she remembers?
Breathe.
My classmate's eyes are taunting as he turns to his friend and sneers, “would you ever let your girlfriend wear weave?” I stared in horror at my classmates’ questions as I had thought the hairstyle I begged my mom to replicate was stunning until a few seconds ago. No matter what way I tried to style my curly hair, it never seemed I could win the approval of my classmates. I could feel the tears welling in my eyes.
Breathe.
I had exited the elementary school bus and rushed to my closest, tears welling from my eyes. That day I had not only confessed to my mother that I no longer had faith in God, but I had also received a referral from my teacher. I could hear my mother walk into my closet with a frown on her face, “are you acting out because you lost faith?” I just wanted to find my own answers about the universe, but all I could feel was disappointment from failing to follow what was expected of me.
Breathe.
My sister is perfectly healthy now, and we had many more arguments after that moment. I’ve learned to love my hair in whatever style I have, regardless of people's opinions. My mother and I have come to terms with my religious experience. I just wish in those moments I had taken a step back, taken a deep breath, and realized that those experiences weren’t the end of my life. In those moments it felt like my world was closing up, but now when I look back at those events I realize how much I’ve grown and changed since then.
“Why is your hair so nappy?” and other comments during my time in high school haven’t left me shaking and crying as they would have. Now I just take a deep breath and roll my eyes at the immaturity of my peers and keep moving.
If there was one piece of advice I would give my past self, it would be to take a deep breath and understand that even though it might be difficult currently, I can get through this. While I’m still facing difficult challenges, such as paying for college, I know through taking a second to breathe that I can make it through this and other challenges I’ll face in the future.