That's How You Learn by Natalia

That's How You Learn by Natalia - July 2016 Scholarship Essay

“You make mistakes, that’s how you learn,” Marinee said, sitting in the middle of a group of around 30 students in cold metal chairs, all listening intently. Upon hearing those words, I leaned back, closed my eyes, and let out a ragged sigh of relief. Throughout all my years in school, it was what I needed most to be told, and I knew in that moment, watching the anxiety dissipate from the faces of my classmates, that I was not the only who did.

In elementary, middle, and even high school, the implicitly implied idea that failing is shameful is what kept many of us motivated to succeed academically. Quickly, however, the definition of what it meant to succeed or not succeed became what the system deemed “below average,” “average,” and “above average” instead of something sculpted to each individual’s sense of satisfaction. Suddenly, learning became less about risk-taking and more about making sure you fell into the right category. As children and adolescents, we are easily fooled into believing that there is no other way, that staying comfortably inside of the boundaries created for us is more rewarding than experimenting with one’s creativity, and possibly erring in the process. We are taught to fear failure. We are taught to glorify the red-inked A’s written on our projects, even when we know that they were only earned by following the pattern. We are taught that “we,” “I,” and “you” must never be used in a formal essay under any circumstances. I believed it. I believed it all until I walked into Marinee Payne’s Acting I class that fateful first day of 9th grade.

Immediately upon entering her room, I could feel the atmosphere grow lighter, less suffocating and intrusive. In the place of traditional desks sat metal chairs arranged in a wide semicircle, all seemingly welcoming. When the bell rang and the room began to fill with nervous chatter, Marinee emerged from her office, took a seat atop a small wooden box in the middle of the room, and with the most reassuring smile I’d received all day said to us “Hellooo everybody, I’m Ms. Payne, but please feel free to call me Marinee. Welcome to Acting I.” And so the journey began. Instead of trying to fit us into categories, Marinee allowed us to blur lines, stretch boundaries, and destroy whatever barriers we had previously established for ourselves. I felt free to explore my sense of self in her class, knowing that, in her words, “Sometimes the magic happens, and sometimes it doesn’t,” but you will never know if you never try. She pulled us, slowly, out of our shells, and empowered us to look beyond the gratification of a grade, to instead try things for the sake of curiosity, to instead understand that life is more about feeling satisfied with oneself and one’s efforts than it is feeling rewarded.

The most important lesson I learned in that class was to take chances anytime I could. Take chances in my academic, personal, and lifelong endeavors so that there wouldn’t be a day in my waking life that I would regret not doing so for fear of failure. After all, making mistakes? That is truly how you learn.