Hatred of Math by Michelle

Hatred of Math by Michelle - April 2019 Scholarship Essay

I've always struggled with math. Actually, I hated it. With a deep, burning, passion. While I was growing up, I could never understand how numbers got mashed together and what multiplying numbers really meant. In my head, mental math just looked like meaningless numbers floating around. Numbers never really.. Added up to me. So imagine the mortifying day where I had to walk up to the front of the class and solve a problem I didn't exactly know how to solve. It wasn't just numbers, there were letters mixed it. Every single time I tried to write something on the board, my teacher would erase it, scolding me and telling me I was wrong. I would hear my classmates behind me . I felt the burning sensation of tears building up. Immediately, I broke down sobbing uncontrollably in front of the whole class. This didn't just happen once. It happened multiple times throughout middle school.

My hatred for math carried on into high school. I would spend nights just screaming and crying because I couldn't make sense of these numbers floating around on my Algebra homework.

Geometry was where it all changed. Numbers meant nothing to me but shapes were tangible objects. Things that could be touched, moved, and comprehended. My geometry teacher knew about my intense hatred for math and instead of forcing me to go up to the dreaded whiteboard, he allowed me to learn without pressuring me. This was the first time where I felt like I could relax in a math class. The work was still difficult and even though I was in sophomore year, I still struggled with basic algebra concepts that I needed to apply in geometry. However, armed with a supportive teacher and tangible shapes, I pushed through. By making it enjoyable for myself and receiving support from a teacher, my view on math changed entirely. Instead of seeing an impossible task, I saw it as a challenge that I could overcome. All it took was an understanding teacher and a subject that seemed tangible in my mind to change everything.