This Year's Goal by Maria

This Year's Goal by Maria - August 2022 Scholarship Essay

After surviving law school for the Spring and Summer semesters earlier this year, I finally accepted that my procrastination was something I needed to work on as soon as yesterday. I can admit I was that person that bragged about “working best under pressure” as a way to make myself feel better about procrastinating. Honestly, I’m actually surprised that I’ve endured school this long without fully finding a solution. I was able to get through my associates degrees and complete my paralegal courses and foolishly I convinced myself law school would be no different.

I was the last one to leave my last final exam of summer session and immediately let the tears burst from my eyes when my body exited the classroom door. I had never experienced that level of disappointment or felt so unprepared for an exam, I was defeated. Initially, I laughed at myself for even thinking I was capable enough to succeed in law school working full time, raising a toddler and having a life. Mentally, I settled for remaining stagnant professionally until retirement. After a handful of degrading thoughts, I realized that I had never settled and I wasn’t ready to. Although I never previously felt what I did after that final, I agreed I also never wanted to feel that again.

I knew I had to prepare for success the upcoming fall semester. I attended zoom seminars hosted by attorneys and current law students as well as law school boot camps only to finally grasp that procrastination would be the end of me. In order to overcome my procrastination, I began to implement the use of a daily hourly agenda and integrated my school schedule with important examination dates and study weeks. Subsequently, I have shared these important dates with my employer and made adjustments to my work schedule in order to schedule much needed study time well in advance of exam dates. I have also acknowledged that my time is very valuable, but it is also easy to lose track of it and feel like there is never time in the day to get things done. I have most recently started the “5am method” which allows me to tend to myself peacefully, while preparing for my day and also makes my days feel longer. This gives me additional time to take care of personal matters and also have time to tend to coursework. All that is left for me to do is to use this system while in school, and that will take consistency from my part and courage to ask for help when I need it.