The Reason Behind It by Lourdes

The Reason Behind It by Lourdes - December 2016 Scholarship Essay

It had been seven years since any one died in my family-at least anyone I was close to. Then, in tenth grade, my grandfather passed away. Tenth grade had been a vicious year for me as I took two AP classes and two Honors. As a sophomore on high school, I was not very accustomed yet to the vigorous work that AP and Honors classes entailed.

English Honors was my most difficult class that year. "I don't round. And there is no extra credit. You will work for every point that you have." Those words frightened me. All my other classes offered extra credit or some way of occasionally earning points. The first semester of the class went smoothly; I ended the semester with an A plus. However, second semester was another still.ory. In the winter, my grandfather became ill. He lost his appetite, and soon he stopped speaking. He had cancer of the throat. With this news, my family often visited my grandfather to care for him. Among all this, I began to struggle in English. When I say struggle, I mean I had s grade less than an A. I had a B during this time. A grade less than an A was something I was and still am not used to. While the rest of class was failing, I had a B. Yet, this was not satisfactory to me.

When I spoke to my father to inform him of my struggle and the possibility that I may earn a B in the class, he was shocked. Repeatedly, my father encouraged me, reminding me of the writing talent that supposedly runs through my family. My grandfather was a journalist in the Phillipines, and my father was applauded for his writing from those who ever read a work (which he claims is no big deal).

Well, among all this, my grandfather is slowly dying, and I am slowly losing motivation because of his illness and the struggle in class. With this emotional test life throws at me, I am also introduced to a kind of test I have never experienced. My English teacher's test can be passed only by those of who can discern between all the choices. And the essays? The essays were what this teacher wa known for. "She marks your paper with red all over. It is as if the paper bleeds red". How could I pass this class with an A?

The time comes in January when my grandfather pases away, and my high spirits fade. Pain is all I can feel, and my spark of ambition begins to fall like an avalanche. After weeks, I still feel the same. With the pain in my heart from my grandfather's test and the squeeze of pressure for my desired grade, I pushed even harder. For every essay, I stayed at school for tutoring. I was not going to be defeated by this class. I received a high B on my first essay, a low A on my second essay. Eventually, it was time for the final essay. This is when I stayed until six in the evening for tutoring. As I awaited my essay grade, the class had a quiz in which other students received a higher grade than me. I cried out of fear, knowing my grade would drop somewhat.

I spoke to my teacher during a tutoring session outide of class in March, asking if it were still possible to have an A. I began to cry, telling her of my personal issues. I was nervous to speak as well because I did not want to ask for too much.

On the day of the final, air was the las tone to finish my test. Tempted to reach perfection, my teacher advised me not to second guess myself. I turned in the test, feeling as if I had made my heart bare. On that day, the essay I had awaited was given back, and I had received an A! Every night, I thought about my grade until grades were finalized. I finished the class with a 90%, the only A. I was glad I had not second guessed myself on the test. That has been one of my hardest academic years considering my age then. Although, my grandfather passed away, I found strength and hope, leading me to my success.