Feminine Friendship by Liya

Feminine Friendship by Liya - March 2024 Scholarship Essay

I am a true lover of love, a hopeless romantic at heart. With a heart that embraces the essence of femininity, I find joy in corny romance movies, 'meet cute' couples, the sight of elderly partners sharing meals at restaurants, and planning my dream wedding on my Pinterest board. But in my fervor for the romanticized love, I almost overlooked the other facets it encompasses, the beauty of platonic love.

Years ago, a memory stands out when I felt disconnected from a friendship that could have nurtured my divine feminine essence. I remember as a young one watching girls glide past me in gym class, dressed in frilly bows, elaborate hairstyles, high stockings, and charming Mary Jane flats. What set me apart from them so early on, I couldn't quite discern—perhaps it was the fear of imposing, of encroaching on their space.
Throughout my life, I had never truly experienced the depth of a feminine friendship—a bond that allowed me to embrace my femininity, my softness, and to feel wholly accepted as myself. It wasn't until my sophomore year of high school, a friendship unfolded unexpectedly through Student Council. Soon, we were inseparable. It's rare to find women who are keenly aware of their own divine feminine power—it's an energy that is unstoppable. With her, I could openly share my thoughts and feelings without any hint of shame or guilt; she encouraged me to proudly wear my heart on my sleeve.
Her presence felt like finding my way back home, a comforting familiarity that anchored me. I sensed that this was a pivotal moment for me, a time to fully embrace the path unfolding before us.
As the elections for student council officers approached, I found myself amidst a whirlwind of conflicting emotions and shifting allegiances. The atmosphere crackled with tension as individuals shed their masks, revealing their true intentions. It was in this charged environment that I made a silent pact with myself—a vow to uphold sincerity and genuine effort above all else.

Sitting in the quiet of my medical ethics classroom, the weight of this decision settled upon me like a heavy cloak. It was then that my friend, a companion from our shared career specialty, entered the room, visibly shaken. Her distress was palpable, and as she confided in me about the baseless accusations being hurled her way, I felt a surge of empathy.

In that moment, I knew I could not openly support those who sought to tarnish her reputation unjustly. Despite the discomfort it brought, I stood firm in my convictions, setting a clear boundary. Yet, little did I anticipate the repercussions—suddenly, I found myself cast as the villain in a drama I had not written.

Harassment and accusations rained down upon me, painting me as the source of tension among candidates I barely knew. It was a lonely position to be in, standing on the side of truth while the world seemed to turn against me. In those dark moments of doubt, the words of wise women echoed in my mind like a soothing mantra.

"It does not matter if you are criticized for standing up for what is right," their voices whispered, "What truly matters is that you stay true to yourself, even in the face of rejection."

Amidst the turmoil, I sought solace in the sanctuary of my friendship. Turning to my dear friend, I hoped for solidarity, for a shared understanding. However, her response was unexpected—a nod of agreement, tinged with a hint of defiance. I sensed the divide between us, a subtle rift born of differing perspectives.

When she revealed her intention to take a neutral stance, supporting one side over the other, I was taken aback. Yet, a deep-seated respect for her autonomy prevailed, and I chose to honor her decision. Still, a sense of unease lingered within me—a patchwork of conflicting emotions that refused to be neatly sewn.

As the final day of voting loomed, anxiety gripped us all, overshadowing the joy of our spring carnival celebrations. Yet, amidst the chaos, I found a moment of respite standing beside my friend. We laughed, dodging bursts of colored powder and reveling in the simple joy of each other's company.

When the dust settled and rumors of tampering surfaced, I found myself once again at her side. In that moment of vulnerability, our differing viewpoints faded into insignificance. What truly mattered was being there for her, offering comfort and reassurance in the face of uncertainty.

Yet, as time passed, I watched with a heavy heart as she began to distance herself from me. It was then that I realized the profound lesson this journey had taught me. I could no longer cling to the comfort of familiarity, of a friendship that existed within the confines of shared beliefs.

Instead, I embraced the discomfort of growth, recognizing the need to evolve beyond the boundaries of my own convictions. Our friendship, though fleeting in its intensity, had been a crucible of self-discovery..

Through this experience, I discovered a newfound sense of solidarity within my feminine identity. Her differing perspective had challenged me to confront my own biases, opening my eyes to the complexity of life's tapestry. And though our paths diverged, I will always cherish our friendship for the growth it afforded me—the growth that allowed me to step boldly into the unknown, unafraid to embrace the ever-shifting hues of life.