The World of Psychology is for Me. by Kyla

The World of Psychology is for Me. by Kyla - February 2024 Scholarship Essay

Generational trauma often lingers in black households, causing older generations not to believe in seeking therapy or talking about mental health issues. My peers have said that even bringing up the slightest bit of feeling depressed, their elders would say, “It's because of that phone,” or “Go depress them dishes in the sink.” I was a child that bottled everything inside; a lot of my elders never talked about emotions. It wasn’t their fault, but speaking out as adults, even if they had something negative to say, helped change their views a bit. Experiencing my elders and even friends stigmatizing my mental health issues, led to feelings of depression, anxiety, stress, and loneliness. It even went as far as thoughts of feeling like I was better off if I wasn't here because my feelings weren’t being heard or they weren’t taken seriously. This is a harmful issue that people experience, especially for kids/teens because sometimes they are simply not able to regulate their emotions/actions as well as a full-grown adult. Feelings can lead to acting on impulse and that’s not always a good thing. After many years of working on myself, I came to a realization that my feelings do matter and it’s okay to express my emotions. It wasn’t easy because I wasn’t able to go to therapy, so I had to go through many days of crying, journaling, loneliness, and praying. But ultimately, I made it through that rough patch alive and I am beyond grateful to say that. Sitting back and listening to the experiences of my friends and elders, along with myself, sparked an interest in the mental health field as a career.

At times, I find myself questioning my drive for wanting to be in such a career because I wonder : if I want to indulge in mental health because I never received this type of advising or if I am sure this is the career I want to pursue? I spent most of my high school years going back and forth between careers because the people around me were doubtful I'd earn a sufficient amount of money in certain careers. Also, they were not sure I’d be good at my job because of my personality. They know me as a quiet girl, who never really talks about her feelings and they would believe I’m introverted. However, I knew I wanted to pursue a career that will bring me happiness, so I took AICE psychology. The class was more research-based, but I still loved everything about it, including learning all the different case studies. However, my family was still doubtful about my career choices because they didn't know if I would flourish in that field because it’s “draining” and you need to be “mentally strong.” Nevertheless, I still gravitated towards a career in the mental health field because I feel like I have a calling to it and a purpose to pursue psychology.

Lack of knowledge about mental health and generational trauma are issues that are still prominent today within many households, especially for people of color. I know that I have to go to college in order to gain further knowledge in psychology and neuroscience. I researched a multitude of careers in psychology and am looking forward to exploring those different options in college. Focusing on clinical psychology will allow me to carry out the wishes of being of aid to children who were once in my shoes as I will learn how to address the different psychological issues and emotions people experience throughout their lives. While minoring in neuroscience, I will learn about the anatomy of the brain and how each person's thoughts and behaviors coincide with the nervous system. When I graduate with my degrees, I will be able to use my knowledge to be an advocate for mental health for people within the Black community. I will use my education to help educate others about different ways to cope with mental health issues and I want to reassure others that they are more than just a label. I would like to play a role in trying to help people mend their problems, especially helping those dealing with harsh experiences from the older generations within their families, who never really understood the importance of mental health or never healed from their own traumas. I want to go to graduate school and graduate with my Psy.D., so I can later open my own practice after years of experience. I want to break the curse of generational trauma and help children/adolescents grow up to be emotionally intelligent. Nelson Mandela said, "Education is the most powerful weapon which you can use to change the world," and I want to further my education in psychology and be a powerful weapon in which I can use it to change the world.