Becoming Myself by Joshua

Becoming Myself by Joshua - July 2025 Scholarship Essay

Growing up, I desperately wanted to be part of the "in crowd." I craved acceptance and worked tirelessly to make sure everyone liked me. This desire slowly turned me into a chameleon—someone who constantly shifted their personality depending on the group I was with. I would change how I acted, the way I spoke, even what I claimed to care about, all in an effort to fit in. At the time, it felt necessary. I thought that if enough people liked me, I’d eventually start to like myself.

Looking back, I realize that this pattern of behavior stemmed from not knowing who I truly was or what I stood for. Without a solid foundation of values or self-understanding, I allowed the opinions of others to shape my identity. My feelings, my choices, and even my self-worth were all wrapped up in external validation. It was exhausting. And worse, it kept me from forming real, meaningful connections—not just with others, but with myself.

If I could go back and give my younger self one piece of advice, it would be this: take the time to discover who you are, and once you find that person, never be afraid to live as your authentic self. You don’t need to twist and shrink yourself to fit into someone else’s mold. You don’t need everyone to like you. What you need is to like and respect the person you see in the mirror.

There’s incredible power in self-acceptance. When you know your values, when you're confident in who you are, you no longer feel the need to chase approval. Instead, you attract the kind of people who genuinely appreciate you for being real. That’s the kind of connection that lasts—and more importantly, it’s the kind of life that feels whole.

I’m still learning and growing, but I’ve come a long way from that chameleon. Today, I understand that being liked isn’t nearly as important as being honest—with myself and with others. And I’ve found that the more I live in alignment with my true self, the more fulfilling life becomes.