Hopeless to Hopeful by Isabella

Hopeless to Hopeful by Isabella - February 2024 Scholarship Essay

Navigating depression is like sailing a ship through a fog. There is no way to avoid it. It
rolls in unexpectedly and creates confusion, disorientation, and a lack of vision. I felt like a lost sailor last year when I suffered a season ending injury. Nothing could have prepared me for the mental and emotional challenges I would endure. However, I learned that the densest fog will eventually dissipate allowing conditions to improve.

I’ve been an all-star cheerleader for nine years. On November 30, 2022, during the last repetition of practice, my junior season was over within seconds. I had dislocated and tore the labrum in my right shoulder. A myriad of emotions rushed in including anger, confusion, frustration, sadness, and uncertainty. Sports injuries happen daily. I never imagined mine would happen by lifting someone over my head and tossing them into the air. Following surgery, the doctor provided a course of action for the months to follow. I knew how time-consuming rehabilitation would be and that I would no longer be able to practice with my teammates. I was not prepared for my mentality to descend into a downward spiral.

Growing up I tried sports and activities, but nothing was a fit. After joining my all-star cheerleading gym, I felt like I was finally a part of something. Being an only child, I never knew what it was like to have siblings. My teammates and coaches provided me with a sense of support and comfort that comes from a family. Whether I had a bad day at school or an argument with friends, the gym was my sanctuary, my home away from home. My injury had taken this coping method away from me. Feelings of insecurity, anxiety, and self-doubt started creeping in like fog clouds slowly covering the sea. Physical therapists gave me exercises to help strengthen and stabilize my shoulder, but no exercises were given to help stabilize my thoughts and feelings. I began doubting my ability to return to cheer at the same level. Would I ever be able to tumble again and be as strong as I once was? My first post-surgery visit to the gym, I felt like an outsider to my own family, as I was unfamiliar with watching and not participating.

As I struggled to escape the grips of depression, I was not sure who to reach out to for help. My parents and coaches suggested I reach out to others who had dealt with injuries. I was able to connect with other athletes who could relate to the feelings I was experiencing. I found that continuing to go to practice and competitions with my teammates could actually help with my ability to cope. My new role was becoming my team’s strongest support system. I became their biggest cheerleader. I assisted the coaches with routines and athlete positions. My family, coaches, and teammates were like beacons of light helping to guide me through this difficult time.

Surgical scars serve as a reminder of my journey which took me from hopeless to hopeful. I learned that mental health is just as important as physical strength. I realized that by reaching out to others and talking about my situation helped me on my way to recovery. My journey inspired me to enter the field of Kinesiology. I aspire to become a physical therapist who helps people physically, and also helps prepare them for the mental effects post-injury. I hope my personal experience can help others overcome their obstacles. My experience strengthened my resilience and perseverance as I set sail on my college journey.