Taking a step at a time by Diana

Taking a step at a time by Diana - July 2016 Scholarship Essay

My 8th grade art teacher has become the most influential person in my life so far because of an important lesson she taught me midway through the year. If it had not been for her telling me to be patient and take a small step towards a goal, then I would not be the person I am today.

The summer of my entry to 8th grade was filled with me going to the library to check out how-to drawing books. I had become interested in learning how to draw, and I was well aware that during my 8th grade year I could pick Art as an elective class. As soon as school started, I began attending Art with Ms. Von der Haar. She was scary at first but slowly warmed up to the new students along with her returning art students from previous years. I sat with a few friends at our table and we chatted away while working on our pieces. But after a few months, I could see that many of the returning students, and even my friends, who sat at the same table had better drawings at the end of the day. Their line work was amazing, even if we used sharpie to outline our drawings, and the coloring blended well with the Crayola brand of markers and coloring pencils. Ms. Von der Haar would show her work as an example of what she wanted us to do while in her class, and little by little I became discouraged at my own skill. Everyone in the classroom was better than me. I understood that my teacher had years of experience and a Master’s in Fine Arts, so I expected her to be really good. Most of my worries and stress came from comparing myself to the skill level of my peers. I was anxious and I turned to my only source that was trustworthy to know what I was doing wrong: Ms. Von der Haar.

I had managed to make an appointment with her and I obtained a pass from her to bring up my lunch to her room so we could talk in private. I sat there for a minute or two when she spoke without lifting her eyes as she was grading sketchbooks. “So Diana, what’s bothering you?” I turned to the window and tried to explain my feeling of helplessness to her. “I feel like I’m not improving as much. In all honesty, Ms. Von der Haar, I feel like my drawings suck compared to my classmates. I want to catch up to them.” I was very blunt and after two seconds she gave out a light-hearted laugh. I turned to look at her to figure out what was so funny, but she began speaking again. “Diana, your drawings don’t ‘suck.’ They’re your drawings. The majority of the class have spent two years with me and some of them have been drawing and practicing a lot in their childhood years and even during the summer. Art is not a competition, it’s a journey. You just started your journey, so you should focus on what you can do now and take it a step at a time. Eventually you will get there and become even better than the current you.” She now looked up to me and gave me a gentle motherly smile. “Just remember to have fun while you’re at it. Besides, you have improved a lot since you started earlier in the year, so I would say you’re walking well on your own personal journey.” After hearing those words, a huge weight was lifted off my shoulders.
The year ended without incident and I felt that I had fallen in love with art. I was so inspired after my talk with Ms. Von der Haar that I began to look into other mediums like paint and watercolor. I began my high school career and continued to take art classes. Of course, high school art students were on a different skill level than middle school students, and once again I began to feel intimidated by their work. Many of their pieces were original and very well executed, while my pieces were mostly tributes to my other hobbies. I started to doubt myself again, but within my head Ms. Von der Haar’s words resonated. “Take it one step at a time. Art is not a competition, it’s a journey.” I whispered these words to myself before going into class every day and slowly the fear and intimidation I felt towards my classmates turned to admiration. I began talking more to them and asked them to explain to me how they achieved certain effects on their artwork.
I found that these words spoken by Ms. Von der Haar motivated me to get out of my comfort zone and learn from other artists how their creative process worked. Her words of “taking a step at a time” apply to more than just the creative process and building of a portfolio. I apply these words to challenges I face every day, and they have helped me break down big problems into multiple small tasks. I don’t get frustrated as quickly as before and I don’t feel as stressed as others would. I honestly thank Ms. Von der Haar for giving me such deep advice, to the point it has become my life motto.