Giving Love, Giving Life by Courtney

Giving Love, Giving Life by Courtney - June 2014 Scholarship Essay

A few months ago, my cousin was told that she would need to begin dialysis if she wanted to be the first in her family to live past age 35, as her disease was genetic. In order for her to continue to work and spend time with her family, she opted for a home dialysis machine, which caused her a lot of pain and discomfort. Unable to bear the thought of her continuing to live in pain or dying young and abandoning her husband and children, I decided to donate my kidney. Incompatible, we found an incredible Paired Donation Program in which mismatched donors and recipients are combined to help both pairs get the organ they desperately need. With their help, I—and 20 other amazing people—dedicated my kidney to save her and 20 other recipients connected in our chain.

Before this, I had never been in a hospital, never been anesthetized, never had a surgery or a serious wound. I had no idea what to expect in terms of pain or recovery. I kept thinking anxiety would set in any day...but it never did. So many people—family and friends, friends of friends, total strangers eavesdropping--came out of the woodwork daily to tell me how brave they thought I was and what an inspiration my decision to give was for them. That helped make me brave. In May, I was admitted for surgery without a doubt in my heart or my mind.

After surgery was the hard part, not because of the pain, which was easily managed, but because of the stiffness from being bed-bound for a full day. As soon as I got the “go ahead” to get up, I began walking laps around the hospital wing, visiting the others who had been part of this incredible process. I got to see my cousin, color already returning to her cheeks, and her mother and husband, both unable to donate, crying tears of joy for her new life. I got to meet the man that had given her a kidney to help get one for a member of his church, whom I also met. I got to meet the teenage girl that received mine, who had been a week from death if not for this life-saving procedure that I made possible for her, accidentally, by trying to help someone I love. Her parents and grandparents were so overwhelmed with joy they could barely speak, but her father--also a donor--wrapped me in a hug (gently) and told me I had restored his faith in humanity by saving his daughter's young life. In that moment, I was so overwhelmed with a sense of good and happiness that there was no more room for pain or fear.

There are hundreds of thousands of people in America alone who, like my cousin, may die without a new kidney. They are scared of the implications of living with kidney failure. They want to spend a lifetime with their families and friends. They have more to contribute to the world. There are millions more who are able to help, if only they knew that their lives would go on as usual, if not better, as mine has. If I were to write a book, this is the story I would tell—over and over again—to inspire people to help, to tackle to stigma surrounding organ donation, and to promote awareness for life-saving living donation and paired donation programs. I would write this book to dissipate fears of uncertainty for people on the fence about making a decision to give life. Most importantly, my book would tell each reader what a difference one person can make and encourage them to see themselves as that person.