The Battle Within by Austin

The Battle Within by Austin - August 2023 Scholarship Essay

I looked down at the scale on the bathroom floor. Even though I had been watching the number slowly decrease over a few months, it was still a shock. About three months prior, I had begun to lose my appetite. It worsened until I had to force myself to eat. Two months later, I was at the most stressful point in my life thus far. I was section leader for percussion in the marching band and we had multiple high-level performances. My tennis team had qualified for the state tournament, and I was missing school to travel and compete. I had the PSAT, Homecoming, and many hours of volunteering with clubs and organizations. That is when the severe abdominal pain and bleeding started. I had lost over 30 lbs. and was physically and mentally drained. After months of testing, I was finally diagnosed with Chron’s Disease. With the diagnosis, my life changed. As a lifelong auto-immune disease, I realized that I would face continual challenges, good days and bad, struggles and triumphs. I also made the decision to not let it define me or inhibit the way I live my life. I committed to perseverance, even on difficult days when I do not want to get out of bed.
We all have struggles, some are physical, some are mental, some are spiritual. I cannot be defeated by my struggles. I must find the balance between ignoring or downplaying my challenges, giving them the healthcare attention they deserve, while also rising from them and using them to motivate me to conquer each flare as a battle I will win. I have chosen to not let this disease dictate my path nor deter me from my goals. In the end, I recognize that it will make me more resilient to have persevered despite the challenges I am sure to face. I have been careful to not allow the condition to be used as an excuse for not achieving my personal and professional goals. While I cannot deny that it has been a temporary speed bump in the road and likely will be again, I will look back on my life someday and have pride that I was able to meet my goals despite the challenges. I also have a new appreciation for others who fight battles, particularly silent ones, and come out of it stronger than before.
My biggest achievement has been that When I was the sickest, I competed in the marching band events successfully, helped to lead my tennis team to a top-four state finish, reached the state quarterfinals in one doubles, and fulfilled all of my volunteering and organizational leadership duties. It was not easy, but I proved to myself that no matter the hurdle, I can jump it. It was necessary to encounter the desperate challenge to realize what I could accomplish. The experience matured me, teaching me balance and prioritization of wellness, a knowledge gift I might not have otherwise experienced.
The path that lies before me will be incredibly challenging. I plan to attend a large university and major in mechanical engineering with a minor in environmental engineering and courses in entrepreneurship that will assist my goal of working in energy innovation. My dedication to joining university clubs and seeking out research and internship experiences will most certainly be more challenging because of my disease. With stress comes flares and increasing symptoms, but I now understand that wellness, life balance, and dedication can be achieved. Chron's Disease is my battle, and I will win.