Not Exotic, Majestic by Anushka

Not Exotic, Majestic by Anushka - May 2022 Scholarship Essay

I hate the word exotic. There are about one billion Indians in the world, yet I am still classified as ‘exotic.’ To condemn my entire ethnicity to that one word makes me sound like an endangered species. In fact, even whilst living in one of the most highly Indian populated states, words like Hindi and Hindu are often confused and questions such as whether I am a red-dot Indian, or a feather Indian are commonly posed. While some may insist that the word is attributed with positive connotations, to me this word is a reminder that I belong to another country, despite having been born and raised in the U.S.
Growing up as a first-generation Indian in a predominantly white neighborhood, I strove to fit in from a young age. I avoided the sun to keep my skin as light as my friends. I insisted that my parents speak in English in public settings. I even returned home with untouched lunches, too afraid of being ridiculed for their different smells. Despite my efforts to fit in and be categorized as a true American, I remained an outlier.
After shifting to a more diverse environment, I grew ashamed of how I derived much of my confidence from the validation of others. Seeing other classmates boast and show pride in their culture encouraged me to do the same. While being classified as ‘exotic’ did make me re-think my identity as a first-generation Indian, I have learned to celebrate the normality in diversity. I made it my goal to explore and share my culture so that it was no longer foreign to others.
I started by learning the traditional Indian dance Kathak and have now performed various choreographed pieces in front of large non-Indian crowds. I now light every Diya (tealight) on Diwali and take part in an annual color run to share the festival of Holi with my community. I work to uplift communities that may be left unheard or lack confidence in embracing their cultures. I empower the Indian youth in my community to speak in their mother tongue without hesitation, by teaching them the roots of their history. I spend hours tutoring children in Indian languages to help them understand the importance of education and preserving history.
While there will always be a red squiggly line under my name, people will pose questions regarding my ethnicity, and teachers will continue to hesitate when my name comes up for attendance, I am no longer afraid of being mocked for my heritage. I hope to continue this adventure of exploring my culture and other cultures. Today, I bask under the sun, speak in my mother tongue, and happily eat the spice-filled homecooked meals my mom cooks for lunch.
The culture which was once known as exotic is now majestic.