Atychiphobia by Andrea

Atychiphobia by Andrea - July 2016 Scholarship Essay

There are many aspects that differentiates each individual from each other, but there are very few aspects that makes us all similar, if not the same. There are obvious ones, for instance, we are humans, we breathe in oxygen and breathe out carbon dioxide. But the one aspect that is not superficially obvious is: our innate fear of failure and rejection.

This instinctual fear of failure and rejection can be easily triggered by something as trivial as introducing yourself to a group of people or, in my case, applying for college. Growing up in a Hispanic household, being the oldest of two, and being the first one to go to college in the United States played a pivotal role in the fear of failing and being rejected reaching its peak. Reaching senior year, for me, was like finally getting to the top of the tallest rollercoaster only to realize that you still had a long drop to the bottom. Struggling to balance finishing college application, meeting deadlines, typing paper and maintaining a social life, I reached a point where I "burnt out".

The enormous amount of pressure I felt, which was self-inflicted, had taken me to a point of despair. It wasn't until my French teacher and, now, good friend, Ms. Lista, "woke" me up from my self-pitying despair. She told me, that "no great success was ever achieved without failure", and that was the moment that I physically and metaphorically felt "weightless". It was as if someone had taken the 1,000 pound bag of sand off my chest and I could finally breathe again. I was at peace with myself, deadlines and essays were put on the back burner, for I was in control of my mind. Although I had heard many people say that everyone fails and rejection isn't as bad as it may seem, this specific verbal lesson has been engraved deeply in my brain. Every time I become bombarded and inundated with deadlines and other important dates I think back to this sound lesson I was given and I become level-headed again.

Now as a college student, I think back to my high school days and I realize that all the stress and pressure I put on myself was not in vain. I still fear rejection and failure, but not the extent I once did, for I know that I am on the path to success. That fear is not longer a paralyzing feeling anymore, but once that pushes me past my comfort zone for I have the consolation that "no great success was ever achieved without failure".