My Father by Alyssa

My Father by Alyssa - March 2024 Scholarship Essay

Learning to work with others used to be a challenge, even if it was just a simple task. Nonetheless when they have different views and openly express it, knowing i can't do anything about it. My father made this especially difficult. He wasn't around until I was 11 years old, and even then we could barely talk. He knew I didn't agree with what he would say, and he would say it anyway. It always started fights between me and him or between him and my mother. Any time I would have to see him or be near him, I dreaded it. He would say things about my appearance, or me being a liberal, or anything under the book just to get under my skin. We were never close and it took a while to get to where we are now.

Realizing he didn't care and he was one of the people who were “supposed” to care. I had to learn to get over what he would say to me, and that there was no use in fighting. It helped me realize that because not everyone will care about what I think and feel, I had no point to stress about it or try to control what they think either. There was no use in fighting and it only ever made things worse when we did. I am able to speak to him openly now, and we were able to talk things out and get on the same page about each other's views and how we should respond to hearing them. It gave me communication skills that a lot of people I speak to now don't necessarily have. I can very easily set boundaries for what is acceptable to me and my life, and if others don't fit into those standards, that is completely okay. I just don't necessarily have to hear about those aspects from people and if I do, then I know to not respond and just respect the fact that they have their own views and opinions.

Learning to work with others used to be a challenge, even if it was just a simple task. Nonetheless when they have different views and openly express it, knowing i can't do anything about it. My father made this especially difficult. He wasn't around until I was 11 years old, and even then we could barely talk. He knew I didn't agree with what he would say, and he would say it anyway. It always started fights between me and him or between him and my mother. Any time I would have to see him or be near him, I dreaded it. He would say things about my appearance, or me being a liberal, or anything under the book just to get under my skin. We were never close and it took a while to get to where we are now.

Realizing he didn't care and he was one of the people who were “supposed” to care. I had to learn to get over what he would say to me, and that there was no use in fighting. It helped me realize that because not everyone will care about what I think and feel, I had no point to stress about it or try to control what they think either. There was no use in fighting and it only ever made things worse when we did. I am able to speak to him openly now, and we were able to talk things out and get on the same page about each other's views and how we should respond to hearing them. It gave me communication skills that a lot of people I speak to now don't necessarily have. I can very easily set boundaries for what is acceptable to me and my life, and if others don't fit into those standards, that is completely okay. I just don't necessarily have to hear about those aspects from people and if I do, then I know to not respond and just respect the fact that they have their own views and opinions.