An Important Mist by Allie

An Important Mist by Allie - November 2018 Scholarship Essay

My senior yearbook quote is “James 4:14-15,” which is a bible verse that says “14Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes. 15 Instead, you ought to say, “If it is the Lord’s will, we will live and do this or that.”” This has become sort of a motto for me this past year.
At the end of my junior year, I began stressing and planning more than I ever had before. I knew the exact tuition of every college I could ever even think of attending. I knew the ranking of my program of study at all of my top choices. I knew when each application opened, what the application required, and when it was due. I made innumerable lists of pros and cons and things to do. Me and my mom went to college tours together, but I had done so much research prior to the visits that I already knew almost everything our counselor presented to us. My mom was actually asking me questions by the end of the visit rather than asking our guide.
At the same time, I was thinking about nothing else but how important my future was. I was controlling every aspect of my own life. I had driven myself to the point of mental breakdowns when I was cutting a deadline too close or when I lost control of something. I was so concerned with the next four years that I didn’t think about where I was. I’m a senior in high school, and instead of enjoying that fact, I was burying my head in a mound of applications.
One day, I was sitting at a table at Starbucks reading James 4 after a very stressful day full of homework, college applications, and planning my future. I read verses 14 and 15 over and over again. Even after I closed my bible and went home, I was still rolling those verses around in my mind. I had been planning and stressing about the future so much that I had forgotten to stop, take a breath, and realize that no matter how much I plan or stress or work, I will never be sure of what will happen tomorrow. This verse reminds me of just that. Everything on this planet is temporary, and although it is important to my current picture, it is not the most important thing in my life. I don’t need to control everything around me, and I don’t need to know exactly what will happen tomorrow.
James 4:14-15 is not just my senior quote. The verses get me through every passing day, reminding me to relax, for I do not have to carry myself through my life alone. May the Lord’s will be done rather than mine.